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Calling all Men and Women...REQUEST
Posted by rainforestrobin • 4/23/08 • Subscribe to this Discussion [RSS] • Report This Topic
Topics: MEN, men and women, teach, women
What one thing would you most like to teach the opposite gender?
NOTE: this is an earnest question so please resist the urge at innuendo for the moment. IF we do, we might actually learn something from the opposite gender.
Hope to hear your thoughts.
RainforestRobin
User Comments
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To shut up when asked-
tell me about it. my other half talks way too effin' much.
oh wait.
rainforestrobin probably meant the opposite sex, not gender .... my bad. -
To LISTEN! -
@crkian: Yes dear.
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lmao Kelly
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I am quite sure my husband holds the very same opinion
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How would you literally teach this (without being abusive) : ) to a group of women? You are their instructor, so how are you going to convey what is needed and how they can give it?
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Teach it to a group of women in the same room. Bob Hope and No Hope
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Laughing! Love it.
We'll get a sub on the day that you are supposed to show. Okay? That will take some stress off you. -
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool
than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Abraham Lincoln.
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The difference between confidence and arrogance.
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I think humans in general need to learn this... And it seems to be an increasing problem, too. -
I agree ThriftShopRomatic.
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What? Men? Are you kidding?
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YOU SAID: What? Men? Are you kidding?
LOL! Good one. -
There's no such thing as an arrogant man!!
Glad this is the internet coz I could never say that with a straight face
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More technology so I can have a two-way conversation about what I am passionate about more often. Not in a selfish way, but because I could talk about it all day long and enjoy it.-
Yes, I used to avoid technology but I have moved more and more into it as I like learning all kinds of new things. It seems to force me to grow. I am glad for the technology that men have taught me. It's been very useful and allows me to do more on my own and be less dependent on a tech.
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Of course I could talk about green all day long and enjoy it too, so I wouldn't mind a little knowledge sharing in that department too!
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Ya, you and me both. I think the whole world could use a bit more talking about green.
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to ask for directions...-
Oh dear. I better not touch that one. Laughing.
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Still laughing.
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but i think it's true...no one retracted what i said...LOL
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Good point!! LOL
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NEVER!!!!!!!!!! -
RTBjr73
YOU SAID:
NEVER!!!!!!!!!!
LOL
Love the honesty.
We'll send a guide with you in your car. :)
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I lived for a long time in the wild with a man and one of the things we both learned was that stripped of social conditioning there was very little difference between us. Although I'm a very feminine woman and retained that, away from social conditioning I took on many traits that are considered masculine: Take charge, go bush, handle snakes, astoundingly physically strong, could build things, fix things, etc. And while he was a very masculine man he took on many traits that are considered female traits like, emotional availability (cried openly/easily without shame - clear expression of emotions through words, etc.), he often cooked and did what laundry we had, etc. Roles didn't just overlap they completely mixed and became almost non-existent. It was very empowering for us both. I think men and woman have a lot they can teach each other.
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right, rainforestrobin...though some men hate to admit that they can learn from us...
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all depends on how much people accept the social constructs of "man" and "woman." if they try to live their lives according to those societal constructs, limiting their selves by what is "masculine" and what is "feminine" then, yes, of course they can learn a lot from each other.
not everyone buys in to those norms, however.
for example, when i defined myself in a different thread as "me" i was not being facetious. i learned at a very early age that i do not fit well into boxes - whether those boxes are masculine or feminine or good student or class clown or whatever. -
Ooooh I like what you wrote here Ender.
I too do not fit into boxes at all.
I wonder...do any of us?
Good comment!
And yes, I have very much sensed your uniqueness in other discussions and enjoyed it. Thank you! -
Pfft, Ender, you'd fit quite well in a box.
Now, if we could just get you to stay there -
ekim941 -- you crack me up! Love it!
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@rainforestrobin
I've had the same experience that you describe here www.blogcatalog.com/discuss/entry/calling-all-men-and-womenrequest#comment_...
And, I couldn't stop laughing at praning's "to ask for directions..." either. -
TIMETHIEF I am very heartened to hear this. Wonderful.
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I think that something that both genders need to learn and understand is that there is a vast difference between equality and sameness. Just like you can have 2 men, one a jock and the other a geek, (pardon the stereotypes) they can be viewed both as equals, without needing to be the same. So it should be between the sexes. Women are equal to men, but not the same, and vice-versa.
WARNING: Broad generalizations ahead, no offense meant :-)
Men tend to be more aggressive, whereas women are more likely to need assertiveness training. Conversely, women will network to a degree that most men can't, even after taking courses on the subject! Neither is better or worse than the other, just different.
Just my 2 cents..
Cheers, Marc
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to be normal-
What is normal to you? If you are female could you please define the "normal" male. If male, could you please define the "normal" female? Or other?
I tried to see which gender you are on your listing but it said, SECRET.
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and what do you mean by that, whatever? :-)
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Yes, do tell.
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That one or two pounds don't make a difference when you're already SKINNY. Geez...-
How true!
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Try to be a good listener?
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Yes, I agree. I think most of us could learn to do more of that.
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I'm a good reader. Does that count?
I mean, I can't actually hear you -
Can or can't?
Either way i'll scream away
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That men are simpler than women, but no less profound. Their inherent (In the true meaning of the word) aggressiveness and possessiveness is valuable, if channeled into the concepts of duty, honor, and obligation. It is the role of older men to instill this in younger men, which is why the loss of an elder mentor, like a father, is so difficult to overcome. Women are the main focus of Men. It's important that women who come to love a man recognize, honor and reinforce these concepts rather than to try to change them.-
WOW, Don. I'm genuinely impressed with this. Sincerely. And do you know, these are some of the very things I've learned about men (FROM MEN) as I've grown older. The idea of reinforcing these concepts is very powerful. I've found that most good men WANT to please the people they love; they even take pride in it. Nice.
I would also throw that we women have to stop expecting men to react emotionally in the same outward way that we do. I've learned that just because men might not show their tears or discuss to death an issue does NOT mean they are not deeply feeling humans and that they are not pondering deep issues.
Something else that might seem odd for a woman to say is that I tend to love the straightforward, simple way of men that you speak of. I've really grown to appreciate and value that...learn from it.
Also I loved your mention of the older mentor. Beautiful. -
I second that wow...I'll remember. -
@Don
Thumbs up for you.
@Robin
"I would also throw that we women have to stop expecting men to react emotionally in the same outward way that we do. I've learned that just because men might not show their tears or discuss to death an issue does NOT mean they are not deeply feeling humans and that they are not pondering deep issues."
I agree wholeheartedly.
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I think the whole "men are from mars and women are from venus thinking" is hype. As rainforestrobin points out, here in the bush we discover that when we are stripped of social conditioning there is very little difference between us.
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Oooh TimeThief...thank you.
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@rainforeatrobin
In the bush, we quickly discover that are all just humans. In the bush, we are not defined by labels and cultural expectations and all that other societal BS.
BTW I do not buy into the thinking that the only thing that makes little boys any different from little girls is their aggressivenesses. What utter drivel! Some of the most aggressive children I have ever had to deal with as a caregiver were female. -
RE: little boys being more aggressive...I've heard several moms say that boys were much easier to raise.
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So in your opinion, a female dominanted society would be just as aggressive as a male dominated society?
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That's a good question Don. I wonder? Hmmm? Do you have the answer?
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That there are no characteristics that are inately female and they should stop making assumptions about individual women based on what they think is their knowledge of "how women think" or "what women want". -
@madame X
I second that. Likewise I am not convinced that there are any characteristics that are innately male and I think women should stop making assumptions about individual men based on these stupid generalizations that we see in magazines and elsewhere. They are not accurate so why do we pretend that they are?-
Yeah, MadameX amd TimeThief!! I love this bare bones insight you've laid out here. It gives us the opportunity to separate from often incomprehensible social conditioning perpetuated through advertising. Maybe it's about looking at people in general on a deeper level. Looking at them without any judgments at all. Imagine a world were we all able to do that. WOW!
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what 'it's' like
h.-
Aaaah yes, h. I agree.
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Did someone already say 'how to put the toilet seat down'? 'cause that's so important when you co-habitate-
I laughed over this. Loved it DROWSEYMONEKY and could relate. I have a funny story about that. When I was younger I use to think that it was absolutely crucial that that seat go back DOWN, especially after I fell into the bowl a couple of times. LOL But then one day a man I lived with went to use the toilet and he said in total seiousness (earnestnes), "Could you please remember to lift the seat when you're done." And I just cracked up. I couldn't argue anymore. I realized it was all a matter of perspective, albeit an interesting and humorous one. At least it made me laugh. I know some male friends who sit down to pee so that it won't splatter. At least that's what their wives tell me. Very considerate.
We need Don Lewis to comment on this one. I can just imagine what he'd say.
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Is'nt the idea of a soul returning as the other sex, theme of a film I didn't see and should have seen 'Orlando' - in which the character re-incarnates several times, each time changing gender?
H -
Oooh I like that h the idea of having to be the opposite sex. Yes, just embracing that concept could make us start to have more understanding. I love it. If I as a woman knew that I had to come back as a man or even be a man in a years time...I think I would start to try to understand men a LOT more, and a whole lot faster. Thanks h
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Well DM, I remember playing on a pile of building rubble when I was around 10yrs and finding a double toilet seat. The building must have dated back to around 1830 (the mind boggles)
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This made me crack up out loud. I mean I've heard of and seen pictures of multiple seater outhouses but the whole idea still cracks me up. At ten years old that must have raised a few questions in your mind. Wonderful and what a life you've lived. So many stories.
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We were created male and female for a reason.
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What one thing would you most like to teach the opposite gender?
Keep liberating yourself!!! Keep growing in every aspect of your life. I feel too many woman, to this day, listen TOO much, and don't speek out enough. The more opinions, knowledge, views that our out there, the better for me.
Thanks for the question.-
Good advice. I like it!!! And thank YOU!
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I'd like to teach them to listen well the first time.-
Maybe that's something we all need to learn. I seem to hear that from both genders.
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What?
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To find the toilet. I know there is a whole big floor that's easily accesible but do something put toilet paper in and play a game just aim anywhere but the floor. -
To talk in headlines... forget giving a host of details! Makes it easier to listen! -
Amen...love that phrase "talk in headlines"...far more politically correct, than "FFS, will you get to the fricking point." -
Yes, for every thing there is a time, a time for headlines, and (shudder) a time for minute detail!
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if we're looking lost in thought, don't ask "what are you thinking about". 90% of the time it's something like, did i remember to put deodorant on? Not, i'd love to repaint the living room. -
patience grasshopper -
How about: Learn to work with the toilet seat! If it's up, just put it down...!
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Why don't we just rip the dang thing off!
Or we could do away with the dunny (toilet) altogether and just go bush.
End of problem.
Then it would be: "Eeeeew! Why didn't you bury it?"
Maybe that's what cave people said. LOL -
Now if I did that I might be subject to that old Aussie curse of: "May your chooks grow into emus and kick your dunny down....."
More fun me thinks to badger SWMBO (she who must be obeyed) into leaving the thing up.... -
Oooh, you ARE wicked!!! LOL
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to be quiet and more sensible maybe? -
I have 2 things:
1. Communication is a good thing, but too much can be annoying. Not all women like to talk "everything" out.
2. Women aren't the only one's with PMS. Men need to get an attitude check at times too.-
I agree we all need to take time out for an attitude check. And you are right not all women are talkers.
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Confucius say: Woman who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse. There is a fundamental conflict here that seems to go ever-on, over the ages.-
lol! I like that one, probably because there is an element of truth to it...
I read a quote recently (can't remember who, sorry) that said, "The war between the sexex will never end because men and women want different things. Men want women, and women want men" -
Even as a woman I laughed over this Jack. Also mberry's comment beneath yours.
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Much peanut butter
One hand risen in hand cuffs
Neighbours call police-
Ooookay, all righty then...
NEXT!!!
LOL
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Flowers are not a waste of money because they die in a few days. The glow lasts way longer than the flowers.-
Absolutely. It is the fact that they thought of you and took action to show you that they thought of you.
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And flowers are easy to do! AND I know very masculine men who like to receive flowers as well. :)
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we brag to our friends about the things that you do and might think that we don't notice. -
Excuse me but the question posed in the OP of this thread was:
What one thing would you most like to teach the opposite gender?-
lol, somehow i read it as what would you like to TELL...
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Not sure it is my job or I have a need to teach the opposite gender anything. If someone IRL is being sexist or stereotyping I don't feel compelled to waste time on them. -
I can't think of anything I'd want to teach oeither gender, other than to respect the differences and appreciate them. -
My man on death row doesn't fight hard enough for parole, and I'm trying to "teach" him to do so through love letters and Twinkies with nail files baked inside.
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